Boy, have we got long tall tales to write about this month! Some are even true! If you are reading this with your morning coffee, make it a tall one. If you are reading this with an evening cocktail, make it a double. Some will call it long winded, but I prefer to think of it as 'comprehensive'. If a picture is worth a thousand words, there is an encyclopedia here. Ready? Take a deep breath, let's dive in!
Trompe
L’oeuil
Several
years ago, Janice painted a “Trompe-l’oeuil” in the yard of our home in
Brittany. That, is a ‘fool the eye’ painting that depicts a scene on a
wall. It can be of a stone edge to a window, a full wall scene or anything in
between. At the time, a passerby knocked on our door to warn us that a part of
our wall was crumbling. Little did she know that it was just Janice’s painting
that looked like a crumbling wall. So, a year ago the ‘artist’ decided to paint
her masterpiece on a wall here, above our pool.
How
to create a Masterpiece
in
9 easy steps
1) Start
by NOT getting authorization as is required in France whenever you want to do
anything to your property that can be seen from the exterior. (Like replacing a
window or door, adding a gate, changing the color of your home or painting a mural). It
is always better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.
2)
Next,
give the wall a thorough cleaning to get things going.
3)
Get
a photo of what you want to roughly replicate.
4)
Make
a rough marking of where what goes with pencil and chalk.
5)
You
have to start somewhere so it might as well be here.
6)
Supervise to ensure quality work and high standards
7) 'Ooou' and 'Ahhhh' a lot at the progress of the 8’ high X 27’ wide mural
(pretty close to
the size of a European billboard)
8)
Keep
the ‘artist’ happy so she doesn’t paint you naked on the beach.
9)
Ta
Da!
Serenite
Over three years ago when we finally started work on our new property here, we
set out to have a pool built on a raw piece of land we bought next to our villa that had been used as all
but a dump site. It was a challenging bit of work as the site was uneven, not
particularly large but with imagination and determination we felt we could make
it work.
Of
course, Janice immediately set out to start buying landscape furniture, huge architectural
plant pots and the like before there was even a hole in the ground. It’s like
buying curtains before they frame your house. The work progressed slowly, but
we soon realized that we would need a sculpture that would capture the essence
of the location much like the statue ‘Inspiration’ does for us at home in California and ‘Tecumseth’ at Honey Bee
Island. We had commissioned him from a foundry in China, and we were quite happy
with their work. So, Janice put her research hat on and soon ‘Serenite’
was born. Pronounced the same in English
and French, she was a natural.
Two years ago, we recontacted the foundry in China that had cast Tecumseth and
we commissioned a bronze casting of our 485-pound sea nymph. (220 Kilos). As
always, it took many months for her to come to life, and many pictures flew back
and forth with our approval of every detail. Hair in a bun? No, it needed to
flow. Arms needed more definition. Check!
From
the factory in the middle of China, she was shipped to the port of Tianjin and
put on a ship to cross the East China sea skirting Taiwan, around Singapore to
cross the Bay of Bengal. The original plan was for her to cross the
Andaman Sea, followed by the Arabian sea, enter the Gulf of Aden, cross the Red
sea to the Suez Canal and exit in the Mediterranean. Unfortunately, there was a 13-day delay preventing us from taking receipt last April, so delivery was put off for a year at our return in 2026.
With
the Houthis launching rockets at ships off the coast of Yemen, they now had
to take the long way through the Indian ocean, around the horn of Africa,
crossing the South and North Atlantic Ocean. From there, she squeezed past
Gibraltar to cross the Balearic Sea to the port of Marseille, France where a friend and I
picked her up after she cleared customs. Done deal, right? Not quite. Back at the house, a little heavy lifting was still required to settle her in.
Unloading her in very disrespectful manner
Out of the truck...
Over the treetops and ...
Welcome home, Serenite.
Being a man, I saw one thing that I thought could use enhancing but I knew better than to offer any comment on the size of anything. I know what side my bread is buttered on. Of course I am referring to the seashells. What did you think I was talking about?
Project of the month
7 years ago, when we bought the villa, the yard gate was a rusted metal piece of junk. We bought a used wood gate to replace it, and it had its day. Time for an upgrade.
This required raising the columns.
Then there was a little issue...
We have had a leak on a lower terrace for a couple of years. Since it is directly over the lower bedroom, water infiltration caused some damage. We took the band-aid approach for as long as we could, but it was time to bite the bullet and get real. We knew it would be expensive and it did not disappoint.
Looks nice, but it's a leaker
Step 1, Jack hammer out all the tiles
Step 2, paint a waterproof membrane.
Actually intended as a swimming pool liner.
Step 3, pour a new slab and color like the rest of the patio.
(In the works)
Last month we left off telling our tall tales when we had just arrived in Scotland. In the days that followed we traveled to a boatload of other destinations across the country. We are huge fans of historical sites, offbeat locations and especially World Heritage Sites (WHS). We hardly want to drive a few miles past a place that has that kind of recognition and not know about it. If you have never been to Scotland, you can see our take on the country here. A few takeaways: Scotts are extremely friendly; the country has more castles than we have McDonalds and many of the roads are as wide as a shopping cart with parking on both sides and two-way traffic. Of course, you do this while driving on the left side of the road. I know you think I am kidding, I'm not.
In the two weeks we were in Scotland I only drove on the wrong side of the road twice. (They drive on the left side here) I could tell by the look of terror in the driver's eyes that were coming straight at me.
Over the years, it has been interesting how often we have visited some place only to find out that it had been the set for some movie that had been shot there. Not surprising really as they are perfect authentic locations that do not require building elaborate sets as they are already in place. On this trip we came across a few more.
Rosslyn Chapel
Parts of the movie The Da Vinci Code with Tom Hanks was filmed here.
Stirling Castle, where 'Mary Queen of Scots' and 'Braveheart' was filmed
.
Linlithgow Palace, birthplace of Mary Queen of Scotts and location of the TV series 'Outlander'
Blair Castle. This would look great in our living room
Serious 2nd amendment followers
On our way to the Culloden Battlefield, we stopped by Loch Ness to see if we could spot Nessie as she is locally known. You won't believe it but I ACTUALLY SAW HER!!! FOR REAL!!! I CAN PROVE IT!!!! THE ACTUAL LOCK NESS MONSTER!!!!Look at the picture above. On the right-hand side way out in the middle...do you see it now? Look harder! Or was it just my imagination....? :)
Moving on to more castles and such, we made our way to the Glenfiddich distillery. No trip to Scotland would be complete without a taste of its word famous whiskey.
.
Above: Preparing the mash. They have 24 of these casks, 17' tall (6 M) most of them below the grill floor.
The distillation. They have 2 buildings like this.
They produce 35 million liters of whiskey a year, stored in 43 warehouses.
Barrels age the whiskey. Some up to 70 years.
This entertainment room is the size of our house.
Wall tapestry
Dunnottar Castle
Now there are Castles and then there are CASTLES! This one is mostly ruins, with some pretty significant buildings and rooms to see. The big deal is its location. To get to the bottom of the cliff to the entrance are 267 steps. Then you climb to the top to the castle grounds. When done, you do it all in reverse. Work your way down to the entrance, then up the 267 steps back up to the car park. That line you see in the grass is half of the staircase. During some historical war, the Scottish crown jewels were kept there as it was deemed to be the safest place.
Montrose Air Station Museum
This was the United Kingdom's first operational airfield
An iron age underground structure (1st century) associated with ancient settlements.
Scotland's Secret Bunker
In 1951, the British government dug a 130' deep hole on a farm out in the middle of nowhere. They then constructed a three level 25,000 sf (7000 sqm) Nuclear Bunker encased in 10' (3M) of reinforced concrete. Finally, they built a simple farmhouse above it to conceal its purpose. It was designed as a regional government headquarters to run the country in the event of a nuclear war. It could house 300 people on site for 3 months, with a command center, two cinemas, a chapel and a BBC studio. It remained top secret and operational until 1993.
Hadrian's wall
Hadrian's Wall was the north-west frontier of the Roman Empire for nearly 300 years. It was built by the Roman army on orders of the emperor Hadrian following his visit to Britain in AD 122. At 73 miles long, 15' high and 5' wide, it crossed northern Britain from coast to coast. About 15,000 heavily armed infantrymen, provided the main body building the wall, assisted by auxiliary units. The deed took 15 years to complete. The most famous of all the frontiers of the Roman empire, Hadrian's Wall, was declared a World Heritage site in 1987. (WHS) This is the 144th site we have visited in 41 countries. We visited Hadrian's spectacular "Villa Adriana" in Tivoli outside of Rome, so this completed the circle.
Bearsden Antonine Wall and Bath House
This second half of the Hadrian wall UNESCO site designation was 15' wide (5M), 14' tall and 37 miles (60Km) long. It was built 20 years before Hadrian's wall. Sometimes a WHS is not jaw dropping in itself. Its significance lies in its age or how it affected world events. Standing next to a stone wall might seem to be no big deal until you realize they were laid 1904 years ago. Only small sections of the wall remain.
These are the remains of the Roman bathhouse
Bothwell Castle is a large medieval castle built in 1242. In 1301 it was besieged by the English with a force of 7000 men for 14 months. They constructed a massive tower and rolled it to the outside wall to lower a ramp over the wall to invade it. They occupied the castle for a month before the Scots returned and took it back over. Very poor return on a 14-month investment.
Scotland's wind farms
If you are a fan of renewable energy powered by wind generators or solar panels you would love it here. The good news is that Scotland gets a serious amount of it's energy from the wind turbines. The bad news is that many hilltops and farms are now covered with them. Gone are many of the pretty views.
Do read the fine print
This chapel on the grounds was the location of the coronation of the first Scottish King in 843. Later in its history the owner grew quite upset that the village started right out of the castle grounds. Hs solution was to simply order the destruction of all 1800 homes outside the gates and have them rebuilt 2 miles away. Still lived in today by a member of the family it is in stunning condition.
The coronation chair was commissioned in 1297. The Oak chair has been used at every British coronation since, including King Charles III in 2023. It also houses the Stone of Destiny as seen under the seat.
At the very end of this mile long straight tree lined driveway is...
Glamis Castle
Castles and Palaces come in all shapes and sizes. All are nice even if some are more modest. A few, and this is one, are absolutely jaw dropping spectacular. Lived in by a family member for the past 600 years, it was the childhood home of Queen Elizabeth. Both the movie 'The Crown' and 'Downton Abbey' used it and its 14,500 acres as the set. We visited 10 of the 125 rooms and suffered from sensory overload. After a while your head just spins from seeing the richness of the interiors.
A wee little dining room
Honestly, pictures don't do it justice Arbroath Abbey
Founded in 1178, King William "The Lion" was buried here in 1214
You may show my subjects in now...
Falkland Palace
Now this my idea of a dining room
Tennis, anyone? This is the world's oldest court (and still in use) built in 1539
Stone steps worn by hundreds of years of use
Glasgow Cathedral
Forth Bridge (UNESCO site # 145 on our list)
Built in 1890
Royal Yacht Britannica
An interesting tour of what was once the epitome of luxury but today looks so 1950's.
This is the royal dining room. Pretty bland by today's standards. Among those who have dined here are Nelson Mandela, Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Gerald Ford, Sir Winston Churchill, Frank Sinatra, And Elizabeth Taylor.
Carlton Hill (UNESCO site # 146 on our list)
The National Monument of Scotland
Prestonpans Battlefield
Fought in 1745. Like the battlefield of Culloden or Valley Forge
in the US, very little is left to see other than huge farmlands
The Barnton WWII Secret Bunker
Impressive entry for sure. Authentic location of this WWII government command center in the event that the seat of government was taken out. It was to allow them to put the country back together if a nuclear strike occurred.
The problem was that they later found that the bunker could not survive a strike with modern nuclear weapons. In any case, they had a BBC broadcast studio that could give the public a 4-minute warning if a nuclear attack was imminent. Just enough time so could lean over and kiss your rear end goodbye. After it was closed, the bunker suffered fires, break in's vandalism and thefts. It is still there but there is little left to see.
Holyrood Palace
This is the official residence of the monarch of the United Kingdom in Scotland. Constructed in 1128, it remains a working royal palace used for state ceremonies and official entertaining. Queen Elizabeth II lay in rest in the throne room seen below.
Scotland's National Mining Museum. Enough said.
Culross
A 6th century village where "Outlander" was filmed.
It is a cute village with a dark history. In this building there is a small room that served as a courtroom. In the 1600's they tried and convicted 1200 witches here. They were held in the attic until sent to Edenborough for 'disposal'.
Had enough? More than enough? Well in 15 days we visited 7 castles, 5 palaces, 4 museums, 3 archeological sites, 2 battlefields, 2 national monuments, 2 bunkers, 2 cathedrals, 1 chapel, 1 loch (Ness), 1 distillery, 1 Royal Yacht, 1 historical bridge, 1 Abbey, 1 mine, 1 courtroom and a partridge in a pear tree. Some might wonder why such a focus on castles and palaces and such. We don't travel in Europe to hang out at McDonalds and Starbucks. Some might avoid Churches at all cost. That's fine except that 80% of the art in Europe is there.
