Psssst!
Hey buddy, wanna buy a Castle?
OK, I’ll admit it. Yes, I have fantasized about buying and ‘fixing up’ an old abandoned castle or two and over the years during our travels here we have seen plenty of them available. We crawl all through the ruins and layout all our plans regarding what we would do first and just how incredibly cool it would all look when we would be finished. They come in all sizes and conditions with some actually for sale and some well….who knows? Some seem to have been abandoned for so long no one has any idea who owns them or if they would have any interest in considering a sale. We found one a few weeks ago that is a perfect example.
Chateau Coat-an-Noz is about 20 minutes from the current ‘Chateau Laprade’, located in a forest bearing its namesake. Built in the mid 1800’s by the countess of Sesmaisons, it is not particularly old by European standards. It was purchased by Sir Robert Mond (nickel magnate) in 1929 but he shortly went bust. A succession of owners followed, none of whom managed to get their act together sufficiently to bring it back to its former glory. There is conflicting information as to whether the place was used by the resistance or occupied by the Germans during WWII. Either way this bad boy is ready for picking.
The exterior structure is all but pristine as there is very little stone work that would need repair. Sure the roof would need to be re-slated but that is to be expected. The place has been vacant and abandoned forever so the interior would need to be gutted. Rampant vandalism is evident with graffiti everywhere, and everything that wasn’t nailed down has been stolen. In fact, even the grand staircase that was nailed down is gone. Moldy mattresses and empty beer bottles witness to the hookers, drug addicts and partying teenagers who have made it home.
And what a home it was! At just under 20,000 square feet over 4 floors, it has 4 corner towers plus an arched stone vaulted basement. With15 foot high ceilings it could have a dozen bedrooms, a humongous dining room, grand staircase entryway, wine cellar, library and a living room to die for. Heck, as long as you are dreaming, you would have space for a ball room and servants quarters too!
OK, so it’s a little rough, but at $270,000. it’s yours! Not exactly chump change but just think of the potential!!! Your very own Chateau in France. How cool is that? Talk about bragging rights.
So why don’t these places get snapped up and made grander than ever? There you go asking the tough questions. To start with, re-slating the roof would cost an arm and a leg. Make that 2 arms and two legs. Windows alone are estimated at well over a quarter million dollars. All of the interior walls and ceilings would need to be redone at a cost that would exceed that if you were starting from scratch. All plumbing and electrical would be a re-do and at the cost of heating the place would take your breath away so some serious and costly insulation would be called for. It would be worth millions but would cost millions to do. And, we haven’t even touched the subject that a little period furniture would be needed also.
Of course all of this is obvious. What is less so is that the government here often requires that these places be renovated by ‘licensed historically experienced builders’, so you can just add lots of dollar signs to any reasonable estimate. Property taxes would get your undivided attention but if you are still counting the pennies in your piggy bank, I am about to rain on your parade. This particular castle has a fatal structural defect as the towers stand on inadequate foundations and are slowly tearing away from the building and heading for eventual collapse. The fix? Simple. Bulldoze it to the ground and rebuild.
Property prices in general here have risen quite rapidly over the last decade. These Castles were considerably cheaper (even relatively speaking) 10-15 years ago. The sad fact is that if one were GIVEN to you, you could not afford it. Whenever I see an abandoned property (Castle or regular house) I always wonder why on the last day the owner walked away for whatever reason he did not simply sell it, even if it was not for a good price. Was it better to simply let it go to ruin and get nothing rather than to sell it and get something? I can never figure it out.
The other significant thing I have noticed is that most of all of the really magnificent buildings you see here are hundreds of years old. The spectacular Cathedrals, the ornate artistic stone carvings, the architecture to die for, it’s all very, very old. Most ‘new’ buildings are quite boring and in my view on the simple economical side. Wood frame construction is rare here and many Europeans are genuinely surprised that we use it at home. Although stone homes are found everywhere in Brittany, virtually no new ones are built as they are too labor intensive and therefore expensive. Instead, they are now built of variations of cement or clay blocks and covered in stucco or plaster. Some add stone 'features' to try to stay in character.
I am not saying all are boring or cheap as there are obviously incredible digs here but am saying most of what is new is boring to my eye. I have not seen any "WOW!" modern gated communities here like in Malibu, mansions like in Florida, Beverly Hills or Newport in Rhode Island among many others. Many of the most beautiful homes here are modern renovations done in very old buildings, chateaux’s or forts. People say “no one can afford to build those kinds of buildings at today’s costs” but those places were quite expensive in those days also and they seem to have managed. Heck, they can’t even afford to remodel many of them today.
Christopher
Here is a little something unlikely to happen at home! France's biggest trove of Gaulish coins -525 of them superbly preserved, dating from 75-50 BC, were recently found close to here during the construction of a highway bypass. The antiquities teams that examine building sites during construction in promising historical locations occasionally hits the mother lode as they obviously did here. As most people bartered for goods and services, people with currency usually meant they were not only well healed but often traveling some distance with their wealth. There were no clues as to who the owners were or why the treasure trove was buried.
I will have mine well done, please.
I am always amused at how the typical French choose to eat their meat. [Factoid: The average European only eats 40lbs (18 kilos) of meat per year. This represents 42% of the average Americans yearly meat consumption of 95lbs (43 kilos). The trend doesn't appear to be likely to change anytime soon as the French meat market is declining. ]
The average Frenchman will eat meat that to my trained culinary eye appears to be all but jumping-in-the-plate raw. I know my taste run a little on the well done side but personally I am put off by meat that is still cool in the center. I have learned that to order meat in restaurants here I must not be casual about it. First, I get the waitperson's undivided attention and say “I would like my meat very, very, VERY well done, please”. They usually roll their eyes and give me that look of disdain. Then, as they begin to turn away snickering, heading for the kitchen, I gently nudge their arm and say “…and when you are done cooking it,……cook it again”. It usually comes medium-well.
The ongoing saga
I have not written anything about our projects here since we arrived in France. The reason is quite simply because we had not hardly worked on any. Other than building a closet for our current bedroom, we had Mandy visit in December, we were traveling for 3 weeks in January and shortly before leaving I injured a tendon in my shoulder. That created a perfect excuse to spend a lot of time on the computer doing some projects that have been in my “one of these days” file for years. Well, my bride finally said that I should quit whining and get my lazy rear end up to the loft and finish our Master bedroom and bathroom.
For the past few winters I have written about having done ‘some’ of the framing, ‘some’ of the electrical and insulating, ‘some’ of the vapor barrier, drywall and taping and ‘some’ of the painting and texturing. I can now report that by the time the ink on this dries, we will be finished with all of it. Whew! Next will be laying some tile and installing the toilet and sink. A sound insulating barrier on the floor and generally preparing the area for carpeting will follow. Unfortunately, we will not be able to carpet or have our fireplace connected before we leave, due to heartbreaking, unemployment induced fiscal sadness.....
3 down, 1 to go
Our village blacksmith surprised us by finishing yet another piece of our fireplace set, this time finishingour forged wood rack. It is a stunning beast of a piece that is a perfect match for the rest of the set and only the fireplace tools remain. It will be a long time before we see those, 
I am sure. Meanwhile, I have started spending a few hours a day with him, several days a week, to make odds and ends that we wanted forged for the Bee.
People often think that we will have problems when we bring these items back and forth to and / or from America and Europe. "they will detect them in the airport Xray machine" they tell me. They don't realize that you can bring darn near anything on board an airplane, as long as its in the luggage hold. Over the years, I have brought a 4 foot sword (1.3 meters), a 50 pound slab of steel [fireplace sacrificial iron] (23 kilos), a suitcase full of metal hardware for shutters, a kitchen sink, a framing nail gun, a large oil painting and even an 8 foot blow gun (2.5 meters) from the Amazon in Peru in the cargo hold. Yes, the Xray machines 'detect' it all, but if its not explosive, corrosive, toxic or outright illegal, its pretty much OK. On the other hand, I have had the metal point of a tracing compass that was in my briefcase taken away from me in more hysterical times.
The Epistle has a hiccup
A few days after posting last month’s Epistle I was looking something up when I noticed a part of the newsletter was missing. Resisting my inclination to call Homeland Security, I opened a new browser to try again but it was simply not there. This blog format has been quite reliable but in spite of my double checking everything before I hit the “send” button, much like its author the blog ‘disremembered’ a portion. I have since fixed it, but just know that you have missed all that was written below the picture of the tower of Belam (the group of 3 pictures near the end of last month’s newsletter). You can scroll down below to it now if you like, but be careful not to go too far or you will be reading 12 month old news!
Have a great month.
